... both physically and mentally. Physically I've been challenged before, but this takes things to a whole new level. Mentally, because I've survived some intense situations that I overcame because of a strong spirit. But when you put the two together, I don't have a word for it, but it feels like a big frustrating happy cry that leaves you... spent.
Today we got familiar with catching a hydrant and deploying large diameter supply hose. Blah blah blah for those who don't know what I'm talking about but it's fundamental skills that all firefighters need to know and practice. But it was the SCBA and stair tower evolutions that threatened to void us of our lunches, lest we suck it up. I am the smallest in my class at 5'4", 130lbs. The biggest guy is 6'5", 260lbs, and then there's everybody shape and size in between. Self Contained Breathing Apparatus and bunker gear weighs maybe 40 - 50 lbs, so we are like bulls in a china shop by the time we are suited up and ready to go. We ran up and down the tower, multiple times, crawled through small spaces, up and down tower ladders, and then, for even more fun, hauled each other up the tower taking turns playing the "victim".
This is where things get hard and humbling. As firefighters, you do what needs to be done. Size, sex, nationality, etc., mean zero when you need to save your fellow partner and pull him out of danger. So we practiced lifts and carries, in full gear, UP the stairs. But our Company has only 5 people, so we had teams of 3 and 2. I was with the 2-man team, paired with a classmate that is about 5'11" 235lbs in street clothes. First he had to carry me up, which, as I could hear him huffing and puffing, was no easy task. Boy, I felt fat and huge! Then, we had to switch. Same teams, just reverse the roles. How the heck was I going to get this guy up 6 flights of stairs? I had some serious moments of self doubt at that point. I knew I had practiced carrying heavy guys in judo, with no problem, but they wern't all bulked up with an extra 50lbs of gear hanging off them, and in judo we were walking across nice cushy mats, not going up a tower. But there was no option, I had to do it, so I carefully loaded him across my shoulders, took a wide stance, and prayed for stability as I took one step at a time up those metal stairs. I made it up a flight and a half before I had to put him down and switch to trying to drag him up, basically doing a modified deadlift / horizontal row while taking steps backwards and upwards. The most awkward thing I've done, and he helped my out by kicking up now and then, but I have never felt so uncoordinated and useless before. Dejected, the instructor told us to come down on the fourth flight, before I killed the poor guy because his helmet came off and I could bash his head against the stairs... ooops...
I felt like I had let me team down, maybe I killed my partner, maybe I wasn't cut out for this... but the instructor gave me a mini Atta Girl, saying I impressed the shit out of him because I was able to get my partner up and out of the way that first flight and a half – removing him from immediate danger, at least. At that moment I felt like crying because I was so upset I hadn't made it up to the top, but a bit happy because Atta Girls don't come often, or at all, during recruit training because we work as a TEAM and nobody gets singled out. So I let myself feel a bit better, even more so when my partner shared with the team my meager little victory.
So this was supposed to have been an easy day, because the rest of the week will be HELL since we are on SCBA the whole time, plus we will be doing ladders. Which may just replicate the pukish-ness of today, and the first day. So on that note, I'm off to study, rest, hydrate, and get ready for another day of Fire Recruit Training.
TD
Today we got familiar with catching a hydrant and deploying large diameter supply hose. Blah blah blah for those who don't know what I'm talking about but it's fundamental skills that all firefighters need to know and practice. But it was the SCBA and stair tower evolutions that threatened to void us of our lunches, lest we suck it up. I am the smallest in my class at 5'4", 130lbs. The biggest guy is 6'5", 260lbs, and then there's everybody shape and size in between. Self Contained Breathing Apparatus and bunker gear weighs maybe 40 - 50 lbs, so we are like bulls in a china shop by the time we are suited up and ready to go. We ran up and down the tower, multiple times, crawled through small spaces, up and down tower ladders, and then, for even more fun, hauled each other up the tower taking turns playing the "victim".
This is where things get hard and humbling. As firefighters, you do what needs to be done. Size, sex, nationality, etc., mean zero when you need to save your fellow partner and pull him out of danger. So we practiced lifts and carries, in full gear, UP the stairs. But our Company has only 5 people, so we had teams of 3 and 2. I was with the 2-man team, paired with a classmate that is about 5'11" 235lbs in street clothes. First he had to carry me up, which, as I could hear him huffing and puffing, was no easy task. Boy, I felt fat and huge! Then, we had to switch. Same teams, just reverse the roles. How the heck was I going to get this guy up 6 flights of stairs? I had some serious moments of self doubt at that point. I knew I had practiced carrying heavy guys in judo, with no problem, but they wern't all bulked up with an extra 50lbs of gear hanging off them, and in judo we were walking across nice cushy mats, not going up a tower. But there was no option, I had to do it, so I carefully loaded him across my shoulders, took a wide stance, and prayed for stability as I took one step at a time up those metal stairs. I made it up a flight and a half before I had to put him down and switch to trying to drag him up, basically doing a modified deadlift / horizontal row while taking steps backwards and upwards. The most awkward thing I've done, and he helped my out by kicking up now and then, but I have never felt so uncoordinated and useless before. Dejected, the instructor told us to come down on the fourth flight, before I killed the poor guy because his helmet came off and I could bash his head against the stairs... ooops...
I felt like I had let me team down, maybe I killed my partner, maybe I wasn't cut out for this... but the instructor gave me a mini Atta Girl, saying I impressed the shit out of him because I was able to get my partner up and out of the way that first flight and a half – removing him from immediate danger, at least. At that moment I felt like crying because I was so upset I hadn't made it up to the top, but a bit happy because Atta Girls don't come often, or at all, during recruit training because we work as a TEAM and nobody gets singled out. So I let myself feel a bit better, even more so when my partner shared with the team my meager little victory.
So this was supposed to have been an easy day, because the rest of the week will be HELL since we are on SCBA the whole time, plus we will be doing ladders. Which may just replicate the pukish-ness of today, and the first day. So on that note, I'm off to study, rest, hydrate, and get ready for another day of Fire Recruit Training.
TD
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